I Kinda Miss “Hairs Thursdays” Already

Here are three rare photos of me without neckwear. I don’t know how I ever woke up some mornings and decided to go around with a naked neck for all the world to gawk at. I’m glad those days are gone.

Oh, look how tender my mullet was in the first photo. I don’t regret that I had a mullet cut. I’d even get one again if I were miraculously transported back to the 80’s. I was “in” then. My short, bleached hairs cut is one of my fave hairdos of all the days o’ my life. Those two pix were snapped in the late 80’s in one of my many SLC apartments.

The third hairy photo was taken in my flea-infested apartment in Arlington, VA in the early 90’s. Yes, you’re seeing correctly: I’m reading THE CHRONICLE. That weekly newspaper has followed me through all my moves. In this way too, I am sooooo much like Mom. Mom loves her CHRONICLE. Like Helen Sr., like Helen, Jr. in oh-so many ways. In every house, apartment, compartment, cardboard box where I have lived, I have been known to desperately wander around asking, “Who moved my CHRONICLE?”

Rare Beasts Of The Earth

Bow Tie o’ the Day and I are Delta Rabbits to the core. Today we wanted to show you the antlers from the trophy buck I killed when I was 16, on my first and only deer hunt as an actual hunter with an actual gun and an actual deer hunt license. (Dad mounted the antlers for me. What a thoughtful man.) I haven’t explored every nook and fissure of the planet yet, so I can’t say for sure whether or not jackalopes exist. I can only say I’ve never seen one. But I am a jackadeer in this photo, and I exist.

Rabbit + deer = a jackadeer. Or, in my case, a jackaspike. Or, a jackaCaliforniatwo-point.