Our Pandemic Christmas

Our Christmas was low-key, but we managed to include all the usual important elements. We enjoyed gifts, and too much food, and a Zoom family-gathering. Suzanne gave us a gun safe for our recently acquired Beretta. She gave me two Echo Dots, so now I can say things like, “Alexa, create world peace,” to which Alexa replied, “Sorry, I’m not sure about that.” So then I asked Alexa to play Band of Horses songs, which she gladly did.

Suzanne wanted a lighted cutting mat for her sewing and crafting, so Santa gave her that. Santa also gave her a puzzle of Ruth Bader Ginsburg’s image and her famous dissents. The puzzle is entirely words. That oughta be difficult and time-consuming to put together, which will keep us both out of trouble. Oh, and I gave her the tiniest notebook I’ve ever seen: It’s smaller than a matchbook. I think it was her favorite gift. (Note to self: Next year for Christmas, save yourself some big bucks by giving Suzanne only a Munchkin notebook.)

I made a pork pot roast, Mom’s cheese bread, and Mom’s famous-in-Maryland green salad. We ate olives, and Suzanne-made cookies, and every chocolate we could find. We found a lot of chocolates. We didn’t even have room for the Red Button Eggnog ice cream, or the Dreyer’s Pumpkin Pie ice cream. The ice cream still waits in the freezer, for when our tummies have room for it. Trust me—the ice cream will not go to waste.

Later on Christmas Day, we joined Suzanne’s family’s Zoom get-together, for the most important part of our Christmas. It’s a family tradition that the family gathers in the afternoon, and Suzanne’s dad reads the story of Christ’s birth from the Bible, and then reads any story of his choosing which exemplifies the giving spirit of Christmas. This year, he read the O. Henry story, “The Gift of the Magi.” Hearing his voice as he read to us made it feel like a not-pandemic Christmas for a short while. And even on Zoom, excited kids were loudly playing and showing off in the very best way, further making it seem like a regular Christmas—if only for an hour or so. God bless us, every one.

Holiday Tie Tally: 184 Neckties. 73 Bow Ties.

Skitter’s Holiday Tie Tally: 22 Neckties.

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