Witty & Wise Ties, Trivia & Lies
Police Tie o’ the Day has surrounded my laptop with crime-scene tape, so I can safely keep upping my bid online, on a silent auction prize I vow to win. I find out if I win the auction item tonight, when we attend a ritzy gala. There, we’ll participate bigly in eating and in the live auction. It’s a fundraiser for education, so the cause is pure. What do I covet? I’m bidding wildly on a ride-along with a cop. LIVE PD, here I come! 👮🏻♀️
Tie o’ the Day isn’t about me. It’s about the ties being all about the ties. Anyone with kids and/or pets knows that “it” is never about you. It is simply not possible to be a good parent (to kids or pets) if you’re all about you. Bow Tie o’ the Day– on Penguin o’ the Day, on Socks o’ the Day– reminds me of our dachsie, Vinnie, who appeared to wear a tux and bow tie, 24/7. He always looked as if he was heading off to get married. 🤵
No time for a weekend hangover. Blurred Tie o’ the Day helps me rise and obey my ever-growing to-do list. Stapler Cufflinks o’ the Day staple together all my little notes, written on bits o’ paper. This way, I don’t have to consolidate my tasks into one efficient master list. Master lists confuse me. Too many straight lines, making way too much sense. It works for me to use my scribbled shorthand, written on whatever scrap of paper is nearest. Stapled together, of course. 📝
The in-laws gave us this 10-gallon barrel to use as part of our emergency/disaster storage. I’m sure they meant for us to fill it with water, but I decided I can be thirsty for the duration of Armageddon. What I can’t do during Armageddon is have an unadorned neck. I have my 100-oz. mini-keg of Diet Coke, and I’ll share it, so we’ll stay semi-hydrated. I’m filling this storage container– aka Helen’s Ark– with as many of every species of neckwear I can fit inside it. 🚢
So I’m joyfully skipping around upstairs, picking out Tie o’ the Day, and here comes Suzanne– groaning and bent over like she’s in labor. Words are not necessary. One of those blasted kidney stones is stuck somewhere inside. We automatically took our roles in this routine. I handed her a pain pill. And she squat-walked back to bed. Tie choice was made easy: Tie o’ the Day displays Band-Aids and words o’ pain. Tie’s helping Suzanne rest and recover. We’re awaiting the impending birth of a rock. 👶
I post frequently about food, which I guess makes sense because we all eat every day. Tie o’ the Day says I’m hankering for Surf ‘n’ Turf for dinner. Cufflinks o’ the Day emphasize my desire for the lobster, especially. I can’t go out tonight because Suzanne won’t be back until too late. I could go out to eat alone, and it doesn’t bug me to do that. It would bug Suzanne to miss out on the feast though. And I don’t want to face those consequences. 😱 🙀
Bow Tie o’ the Day is a bonus gift that came in the mail from a place I buy ties. What’s up with a bow-tie-on-a-stick? It tickles my tickle bone anyway, despite the mystery. The ties and I are having a raucous shindig while Suzanne is away a couple of days, for work in the fast-paced metropolis of Boise, ID. What do ties do to have a shindig? Well, we probably do the same thing as we’d do if we were in the fast-paced metropolis of Boise. 🎉
Like any parent with loud, hyper young’uns (which all young’uns are), I enjoy their nap time more than they do. Ties o’ the Day often curl up with Skitter for their afternoon sleep. When I was younger, and the wee ones finally nodded off, I savored the quiet house. I spent that time doing whatever I wanted. Now that I’m older, when the young’uns are in their deep afternoon doze, all I’m capable of doing is snoring through a nap myself. My life is so exciting. 😉
Tie o’ the Day is part of a dog-themed ensemble: all dogs, all clothes. Although there’s a theme, the look is still eye-catching and non-matchy. I’m a dog– and neckwear– missionary. If you aren’t a dog person, you’re missing out. They really are like shorter-than-us people. I’ve lived with a host of dogs, and I can attest to the fact that their personalities are distinct. Suzanne never wanted dogs, but I told her I’m a package deal. Now, she’s a fan. Maybe “resigned” is more accurate. 🐕
Wood floppy Bow Tie o’ the Day and I just returned from the mall’s tie store. We were last here in St. George in December, and that’s the only other time I’ve visited this particular tie store. But the manager remembered me, and she greeted me like we were decades-old tie pals. It’s not about me. It’s the power o’ the neckwear. 👔 Hey, here’s my replacement mini keg. (No ties on it. 😭) I didn’t mean to match-clash my keg and shirt, but I’m liking it. Serendipity happens! 🤡