Day: February 13, 2023

Posted on

Smooches On A Happy Face, Art On Shoes

This is kissy-face Tie o’ the Day’s first venture out of the Tie Room and into the public eye. It’s a proper piece o’ neckwear for Valentine’s Day Eve. It is also a reminder to me of all the times I have walked around with similar kiss evidence on my face—having forgotten it was there before I left the house. Fortunately, that kind of social faux pas is the kind of thing strangers find amusing even as they gently let me know I’ve got lipstick on my cheek. People who know me don’t give me a heads-up about a set of lipstick lips on my face because they assume I left it there on purpose. They assume it’s just another fashion and/or political statement from yours truly. Nah, I just get busy thinking or working on something and I forget the lip-marks are there for all to see. Needless to say, I know I am loved and wanted every day.

Also, after many years of enjoying wearing my collection of Sloggers garden shoes almost every day and in every situation, I woke up one morning a month ago and wanted new shoes. I haven’t bought new shoes for years and years, but my Sloggers weren’t striking my style bell any longer. They had a good run, but wanted to retire. I’m turning over a new shoe leaf. Doc Martens to the rescue. I’ve had some before—in my younger days—and I have always thought fondly of them. So I hopped onto the Dr. Martens website and I found a pair or two (or five) of shoes which fit my style vibe. They pair well with neckwear of any type. The Doc Martens shoes I’m wearing in this selfie are dang dandy. When I’m in them, I’m wearing art on my feet. This design is based on a section of Georges Seurat’s painting, BATHERS AT ASNIERES. My only regret about these fab shoes is that the shoemaker did not use the section of Seurat’s painting with the red dog in it. Putting that dog on the shoes is the only thing which could have improved on this pair.👞🐕

Posted on

Got Happy? Got Heart?

[I don’t remember writing this. When I read this old TIE O’ THE DAY post which showed up on my Facebook Memories this morning, it was as if I were reading something written by someone else. After reading it, I am pleased to say that I do concur with its message. I agree with everything this author has to say.👍😍]

That is one bigly Post-it Note heart! I thought it best to wear it only for the selfie. Driving while wearing it would probably result in mayhem and tragedy. Let’s see… I’d be pulled over and cited for DWP. Driving While Post-it-ed.

Jumbo Bow Tie o’ the Day is one of my favorites. Actually, I’m fond of jumbo-size bow ties, period. They give off such happy vibes. And we are here to be happy. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. I’m not saying happiness isn’t work. No, it’s something you have work toward. The happiness a bow tie can give is a fleeting feeling. But if you want real happiness, you have to mostly create it. It’s not going to knock on your door, fully-formed, and say, “I’m happiness, and I’m here to serve you!”

I think we get distracted by looking to/at others to find happiness. We think: “They seem happy. What do they have that I don’t? I need to get what they have, and then I’ll be happy.” It doesn’t work that way. Your happiness is singular to you. It won’t look like anyone else’s. It is authentic to you, and you only. It is your job to figure out what your happiness will look like. Ignore other people’s ideas of happiness. Mind your own happiness business.

If you find somebody (a spouse, partner, etc.) whose happiness pieces fit with your happiness pieces, you have found a powerful and rare thing. Your happiness inventory will not be exactly the same as the person’s you mesh with. But what would be the fun of that? Do you really want to be married to a clone of yourself? Another person isn’t your happiness. Your chosen person can share in your happiness, just as you can share in theirs. You are a part of each other’s happiness, not the whole of it. Let me make this clear: NEITHER A MATERIAL OBJECT NOR A PERSON “MAKES” YOU HAPPY. You decide to be happy. You make a plan and work to achieve it. It’s an attitude.

Living with another person gives you daily opportunities to express your happiness. You can care for and spoil them with whatever happiness you decide to share. Take the risk to spread your joy around the metaphorical house. You’ll get hurt sometimes, even in the best of relationships. But so what? Remember, you’ll hurt your beloved too. You won’t mean to, but you will. Unless you’re perfect. Be kind. Be brave.

To be happy in a relationship doesn’t mean you feel jolly every minute. You can be happy, yet experience sorrow, anger, frustration, and every other emotion. Real happiness is not an emotion. Happiness is a state of your soul, not a mood.

If you make a habit of working to achieve true happiness, you can weather the relationship storms you will encounter—more easily and more courageously. This doesn’t sound like it makes sense, but I promise it does: When you are in the storm of yourself—when you are aching—muster your courage and every power in your heart to choose your happiness. Open up your happy heart just a bit wider. Share just a little more. Give. And then rain your happiness down on you and your beloved. Take the risk to love your beloved—again and again, day after day, second upon second. Your relationship will grow stronger. Your soul will thank you.

And one more bigly note: Selfishness does not grow happiness. Trying to get everything you want, and always trying to get your way, is as far from happiness as you can get.

This has been yet another bossy sermon. Just sayin.’