My nephew, Bishop Travis, and his wife, Bishopette Collette, have been married 23 years. Their union overfloweth with blessings. But one blessing has never come to pass for them until this past week: a child. And then look who showed up, knocking her little BYU Cougar fists on their front door. Not only is she a dreamboat, she came into the world already knowing how to do her first bambino trick: she sneezes almost every time her diaper gets changed. She’s worth keeping just for that show-offy trick. TIE O’ THE DAY is pleased to introduce to our readers Grace Anne Blackwelder. (I adore that middle name.)
This is the only grandbaby for my Sister Who Wishes To Remain Nameless. She hogged Grace during our visit to Grace’s home. I was, however, allowed to hold the tiny darling while the new grandma went to the potty room. I timed it: I was allowed to hold Gracie for 1 minute and 9 seconds. That was longer than I realistically thought I’d get to cuddle her, so I felt lucky. I knew to not ask The Grandma if I could hold her again.
I’ve been alive long enough to know it’s downright hazardous to get between a newborn and a new grandma. Just remain calm; don’t touch the baby; and let grandma do her thing. Coo at the baby from a safe distance. Use binoculars from across the room if you want to examine the munchkin’s perfect toes. If you can remember these tips, your arms will most likely remain intact. Eventually, you’ll get your turn to hold the wee one. Or so they say.
BTW I chose to wear my fish taco Shirt o’ the Day and my popsicle Bow Tie o’ the Day to meet Grace for the first time, because I believe it’s never too early to teach kids about the finer things in life: things like Beethoven, Van Gogh, Meryl Streep, and fish tacos and popsicles. I did not introduce Grace to the captivating elegance of The Saddle Purse on our first visit. I thought that might overwhelm her just a bit much.