Category: Bow Ties

Posted on

Bass Ackwards

Bow Tie o’ the Day brings brass musical instruments for playing Christmas music in regal style. One Tie o’ the Day gives us more holiday balls. Three Ties o’ the Day tell us “Merry Christmas.” Backwards. And the final Tie o’ the Day echoes the grouchy sentiments of Hat o’ the Day. Backwards, both.

The mirrored words are, of course, backwards. I meant to do that. No, really I did. I’m making a point about how my brand new stoopid arm sling has got me doing even more things the wrong way. It is yet another obstacle to movement. I’ve been griping to you about my right shoulder, which has only gotten worse with physical therapy. You’d think that since I’m left handed, my right shoulder wouldn’t keep me from doing basic things– like opening pickle jars or turning a difficult doorknob. The problem is this: The only things I do with my left hand are eat and write. That’s it. So I am basically right-handed, which means I’m mostly right-shouldered. Which means my left hand is not all that automatic about small, normal, everyday tasks. This is my predicament. This is what I’m BAH HUMBUGGING about today. This is what I’m plain ol’ BUGGING y’all about in these posts.

But I think the photos I post of holiday neckwear are still worth taking a gander at, even if you don’t read the accompanying complaining words. I can’t believe we’ll be done with Christmas neckwear posts in just a week. And then Kwanzaa’s coming up. I also still need to write the Hanukkah post I didn’t get to write during Hanukkah, cuz I had a bipolar issue. Apparently, holidays never end– even when they’re over.

HOLIDAY TIE TALLY: 68 Bow ties. 136 Neckties.

Posted on

I Gave It A Whole-hearted Try

One “real” Bow Tie o’ the Day. Six Ties o’ the Day. And this is my Ugly Sweater Vest o’ the Day T-shirt. My lame shoulder and I just returned from a morning of physical therapy, and I couldn’t manage to get my right arm in the this t-shirt. It also makes it difficult for me to type, so I’ll keep this short. I’m off to raid the freezer. I need to ice my shoulder, and I need to eat Popsicles with my working arm while I do it.

HOLIDAY TIE TALLY: 67 Bow ties. 131 Neckties.

Posted on

Happy Bra-lidays!

The Tree o’ Bra’s. Flashback! Picture it! December, 1982. An apartment building in Ogden, UT, called Harrison Heights, directly west of Weber State College. (It was still a college back then.) Picture six WSC female students living in one apartment. Three of the six hailed from Delta. Those three gals? Yours truly, Terilyn Anderson, and Tauna Louder.

We had few lights or ornaments for trimming our Christmas tree, so we came up with our own speshul decor. (This is why you should always have clean underwear.) All visitors to our abode enjoyed our sexily festive tree. Especially the Elders Quorum. And I seem to recall our bra tree provoked plenty o’ guessing about which bra belonged to which broad. Ho, ho, ho and ho, ho, ho! Six, count ’em. Six.

I’m still amused about our brassiere-clad tree. But when I found this photo, I– being who I am– wanted to see how the tree might have looked if I had lived alone and had been going through a fit of bow tie mania. I think Bow Ties o’ the Day look superbly fa-la-la-la-la pasted on the picture of the tree. But the bras win, cups down. We girls chose the right when we chose the bra theme.

I can’t believe I still had this photo in my files. These little surprises rock. Such “finds” make cleaning out boxes and bins and files infinitely interesting. On one hand, I want to be done going through musty old boxes and dusty envelopes. I want the culling project finished right now. On the other hand, I hope I never get to the end of mysterious boxes and bins and files of lost treasures.

BTW I’m adding these six, cut-out catalog Bow Ties o’ the Day to our seasons’ tally total, because I do have these actual bow ties in my collection. The HOLIDAY TIE TALLY, as of this post: 66 Bow ties. 125 Neckties. And there are plenty more to come, in the final week before X-mas.

Posted on

Heeeeeeeeeere’s My Winter Cape (Side 1)

Striped Bow Tie o’ the Day is pleased to debut one side of the new wintry cape Suzanne created for me a couple of weeks ago. I thought Suzanne deserved to model my cape in the TIE O’ THE DAY spotlight since she works so tirelessly to make my whims become reality. Not everyone is willing to make capes, even for those they love. Ask yourself if your person would sew you a cape if you really, really, really wanted one. That’ll tell you where you stand.

Please note that Suzanne is in her pajamas under the cape, and I took the photo at 4:04 PM today, a Wednesday. Suzanne woke up with a bad headache this morning, so she said NO to going into work today. We jointly declared it to be a Pajama Day. What did Suzanne do with her day off? She slept-in half the day. Surprise, surprise. And now she’s working on a quilt top, which teems with doggies. Surprise, surprise. She’s laid out the fabric on the floor, figuring out the perfect arrangement of panels. (That’s the best use of floors.) Look at all those teeny squares she took the time to “fussy cut” and piece together. And take a guess who is the intended getter o’ Suzanne’s blanket creation. I’m not worthy! I’m not worthy!

But I am lucky. I can walk under ladders.

HOLIDAY TIE TALLY: 53 Bow ties. 103 Neckties.

Posted on

If Thy Shoulder Offend Thee, Pluck It Off

Christmas-y Bow Tie o’ Yesterday accompanied me to the new hospital in Layton. I cannot remember the new hospital’s name. I was in too much distress to give a damn. I simply followed the directions the Google Maps GPS voice gave me.

What was my ouch problem? That stoopid right shoulder o’ mine. Only ten days ago I was in Bountiful at my shoulder specialist, where I received a cortisone shot. Darn rotator cuff. You can’t make it better by putting a snazzy cufflink on that kind of cuff. The cortisone shot worked, and helped the pain significantly. For three whole days. It was supposed to lessen the pain for at least three months. Rotator cuff fail. Once again, I need assistance to get dressed.

So off I went to see my specialist again, this time in his Layton office at the new hospital which name I can’t recall because I didn’t pay attention to the name because I was in pain and hadn’t had much sleep because my shoulder was acting up because my rotator cuff is hashed probably from back in the day when I was a pro wrestler as a second job because teaching didn’t pay enough because we say we value teachers in the public schools but we really don’t want our taxes to go up so we can pay them what they deserve and then we get mad at the teachers whose salaries suck whenever our kids disrespect them or get crappy grades cuz they’re our precious little babies so it must be the a-hole teachers’ fault but maybe my rotator cuff was hashed up back when I was a Navy Seal and saved the world from matters of such national security that to tell you about my missions would require me to then kill you because you knew the secrets or maybe my right shoulder is toast because I type TIE O’ THE DAY twice a day and although I’m left-handed I do almost everything else with my right hand and because I don’t know how to type I hunt-and-peck type and mostly with my right hand so maybe I’m going to have to learn to become a true left-hander and use my left hand for everything I do although I have never been able to use lefty scissors even though I tried all through my illustrious elementary school career and left-handed kid scissors remind me of Elementary School art projects which harks me back to eating elementary school paste with my friends in Mrs. Reid’s 2nd Grade classroom during recess until Mrs. Judd caught us…..and so on.

And OMGolly, that stream-of-consciousness, all-the-words-run-together-so-it’s-hard-to-read paragraph above seems to be evidence my sometimes-fibbing, storytelling mind is getting back in kilter. Or it’s getting off-kilter in the right way for me to be able to write posts again. I’m back, it appears. Sorta. Knock on wood. Or pergo. Or laminate. Whatever you’ve got.

HOLIDAY TIE TALLY: 52 Bow ties. 103 Neckties.

Posted on

The Bobblehead In Me

Bow Ties o’ the Day caught up with their “matching” A CHRISTMAS STORY  character bobbleheads. While staging this little scene for the photo, it very quickly dawned on me that when I am in the bipolar space I’m in this week, my head actually feels like it bobbles. I feel like I’m a bigly bobblehead. Perhaps that’s my superpower. I am The Bobbler! Maybe I’m even The Bipolar Bobbler!

HOLIDAY TIE TALLY: 51 Bow ties. 103 Neckties.

Posted on

Gaze Upon The Cute-ocity

One Bow Tie o’ the Day gives us mutts dressed in warm Christmas-color garb, while the other Bow Tie o’ the Day gives us wiener dogs wearing jingle-belled collars and nifty antlers. Tie o’ the Day shows us how a penguin makes a field goal. Honestly, I am not a fan of the word “cute.” It’s overused. But for these pieces o’ neckwear, “cute” is an entirely apt word. I’ll use it. This time.

HOLIDAY TIE TALLY: 46 Bow ties. 96 Neckties.

Posted on

A Night Not At The Opera

Bow Tie o’ Last Night spread its Christmas cheer at a new-to-us restaurant find in SLC. In the past few months, I’ve had out-loud conversations with myself about wanting to dine at CURRENT. I’ve googled CURRENT’s menu, and I’ve relayed to Suzanne my enthusiasm about wanting to try the place. So yesterday, when Suzanne said she’d made a reservation for dinner, I was hoping this would be the place. It was. And it is. It is a keeper (pun intended). CURRENT belongs to the same ownership group as my old go-to, STANZA, so I figured I’d be happy with the atmosphere and fare. We were not disappointed.

Golly, my sake-marinated salmon was a culinary pleasure. Suzanne surprised me by ordering the cod instead of scallops. If scallops are on the menu, Suzanne and scallops are the match. But not last night. Personally, I believe making a not-scallops decision was Suzanne’s way of spicing up the relationship. You know, you gotta change it up to keep it alive. You  have to keep your person guessing about you a bit. This was a bigly change-up for Suzanne. Subtlety is her mode.

Anyhoo… Dinner was a definite dessert-deserving meal. Two desserts, to be precise. And I wanted to bring a third one home, but I realized that would’ve been out-and-out sugar gluttony. I’ve been accused of worse. But I decided moderation was a wise course of action for once. (Since my surgery, I have been hungry, 24/7.)

In the photo, notice the background wall’s design of waves and fish. Hence, the place’s name: CURRRENT. It is attached to a bar called UNDERCURRENT.

I planned to get another photo outside the restaurant, which would have shown you my wint’ry cape, but the photographer fell through. Suzanne, it seems, forgot about the required TIE O’ THE DAY outside-the-eatery photo, and she immediately walked off to fetch the car– leaving me striking sexy poses in my cape, under the CURRENT sign, without being photographed while doing it. Silly Suzanne, forgetting a TOTD photo protocol. But the car was warm by the time she picked me up in the street, so that was good.

It’s a total mystery: I’ve tried a number of times to present the totality of my new cape here, but it seems to stay under wraps (pun intended) for some reason I can’t fathom. The cape’s glory doesn’t seem to want to unfurl itself when a photo can be snapped. My other capes threw themselves into the TIE O’ THE DAY spotlight as soon as they were born. But it’s as if this wint’ry cape is trying to remain hidden, like some sort of caped……crusader?

Is this particular cape super speshul? Is this particular cape full o’ superpowers it doesn’t want to call attention to? Is my cape trying desperately to retain its anonymity in order to successfully fight crime and boredom and blandness and whatever else it fights? Does wearing my cape turn me into some kind of superhero, and if so what is my superpower? Time will tell. Time will show. And I can’t wait.

HOLIDAY TIE TALLY: 40 Bow ties. 89 Neckties.